1 Peter 3:1-7 gets people nervous. Peter has just finished talking about a new way for workers to view their bosses. The world does not care about love and respect. We find ourselves at odds with those around us in so many ways. Such thinking can invade our marriages as well.

Peter writes to people where it was often the case that the wife had become a Christian and the husband was not a believer. The joy of freedom in Christ, freedom from our sinful nature, freedom from death and its oppression, could lead people to think that there were no human relationships to which they were bound. Peter reminds these brand new Christians that there are still God-given human relationships that are not cast aside when Jesus dies and rises and delivers us from sin.

Luther talked about three estates, or relationships that God established. He first of all established the church, not just the Christian church, but the church as the relationship where he is our God and we are under his care: "Thy will be done!" Secondly, he established the estate of marriage. "The marriage estate is to be held in honor by all." In the third place, he established the estate of government, to an extent already as an extension of marriage before the fall and certainly as a way to hinder evil and promote good after the fall. God is involved in our relationship with him and with the world.

So when Peter calls for the wives to accept the authority of their husbands, and for husbands to show consideration for their wives, it is not a power play. It is recognizing that God himself built us to be in relationship with others and many of us also live that out as husbands and wives. Such a relationship is mutual service. It means to love the other with Christ's love. The husband is to carry the responsibility of ultimate care for his wife and family and the wife is to respect her husband's role to make sure all is done for his family.

In the fallen condition into which we are born, we never really get there. We can feel cheated, used, lost, betrayed, and misled. But the Lord heals our hearts, starts us over again and again, and gives married life a deeper joy as it is lived in response to our Lord's love. Let us simply know from this that our Lord and Savior is deeply involved in our hearts. Each of us is called to renounce anything that goes against our deepest love. Our Lord promises to deliver us from evil. We can live restored and joyful lives in him.

In Christ our Lord and Savior,
Pastor Thomas Trapp